I was going to name this, The Tim Ferriss Delusion, but do you know who he is? I wasn’t sure. There was a moment when I the envied people like Tim Ferriss. Those who make book writing and mega-blogging look easy. They are the gods and goddesses of the internet. There’s also another side. Well, I got perspective. And I used my smarts. People, don’t buy into the grand delusions and oversized egos of the overnight success stories. They will brainwash you and sell you the ocean. The truth can come out if you’ll let it. Oh…that was easy?
I stumbled across a podcast where one of my favorite bloggers gets rather harsh on air with the host. Penelope Trunk Calls Bullshit On Me. Yeah, that’s the title. She tells him he needs to define his goal. In my words, not hers, he is under the Tim Ferriss delusion.
We must structure a life that’s comfortable for us. Make it workable. What’s most important? It’s easy to let small things fill up space. I can waste more time trying to decide which picture to post at the top of each weekly blog entry than it takes to write the blog. That’s ridiculous. Rarely does it matter.
“The road to hell is paved by perfectionists working with grains of sand. Uh-oh… Missed a spot.” Sarah Ban Breathnach – Simple Abundance
If You Want It:
Write down your goals. Know what you want from the beginning. Let your family know. Tell your friends. Don’t be ashamed or hide it, unless they are going to sabotage you. Get help and support if you need it. When I was in my last writing sprint, http://nanowrimo.org/ helped me hit my goal. It was the crunch and the ideas of other people that helped.
Limit your resources. We use the elimination diet to find what’s causing our food allergies. In the same way, we can use a media elimination to find what’s disturbing our peace and equanimity. Whether it’s the news or social media, start dropping them.
Structure your time to put the extra projects you want to get done early in the day. I’ve been getting up at 5:00 A.M. to do my book editing. Silly? Well, it’s either then or wait until I come home in the evening. I tried doing that, and other obligations kept limiting my time. It was a hit and miss. I found I was sporting a ‘tude. Angry at the world is not a good look for me.
Nothing happens by mere thought alone. Sorry to all of The Secret lovers. Even Stephen King took a job. But he purposely chose one where he could write while he worked also. He was intentional. He had a goal. If you have time, I recommend listening to the podcast I mentioned above. Yes, it’s harsh. But there are some gold nuggets in there.
Contentment hasn’t been an easy topic for me. It’s a subject I’ve struggled with since I don’t understand it. I rarely feel it. There are moments when I lose myself in a movie or a good book and forget about contentment, and I might even feel bliss.
Don’t believe anything is dead until you’ve burned it, poked around in its ashes, and then waited a day or two to see if anything rises from them. Jerricho Barrons in Bloodfever, by Karen Marie Moning Ch 10
IS IT DEAD?
I get angry when I hear the outrageous lies of quick schemes for getting rich told to simple people and that’s probably an expected reaction, but I’ll tell you the one that caught me off guard recently. It’s a simple, cute blog, it’s called, Cupcakes & Cashmere and I like it. BUT. I like fluffy and sweet, mostly. I hate my reaction because I wish I could be content with being the type of person that reads blogs about fashion, dating, and cupcakes. BE HAPPY, JANET! Then there’s the entry -> The Moment I Knew G Was the One. Oh dear! I swoon. I think that was probably my issue. It wasn’t her fault. I blame the darkness within. You did read the quote above by Jerricho Barrons, right? Darkness.
WHY IS THE FLUFF NOT ENOUGH?
Making assumptions is easy. I can frame or reframe any scene as scary, happy, cheerful or content based on the wording that I use. Music has the same power to change perception. Play a bit of sad music along with any reel of video and most women will feel the need to cry. The music will pull at our heart strings, loving creatures that we are. Watching little children playing on the beach seems innocent enough, but I dare you to play the music to Jaws while you’re watching.
THE GAME OF MORE
Is a person’s life all that it appears to be? A picture may be worth those thousand words claimed, but today’s gloss & splash advertising has trained us to polish ourselves as beautiful as the photo. And what if we don’t match up? Try harder. Buy more product. People will buy just about anything for the promise of perfection. What does this have to do with contentment? Heck, if I know. For me, there is no ONE, of anything or anyone. Most of life is a game we all play. There are a lot of adventures in life and a lot of experiences.
I’ve just posted a new short nonfiction book, The Big Five. It takes you through Arrogance, Doubt, Shame, Perfectionism, and Unrealistic Expectations. Short read, not expensive and I hope you enjoy it. Thanks all!