Nighttime was once a vast expanse for me. Its shadows held exciting mysteries, forever expanding. Darkness was the keeper of secrets and enchantments. 

I wanted the darkness to be a magician. Charmers, persuasive people, mesmerizers, and narcissists have wowed me in the past and even taken away the power of choice. I’m like everyone else. I’ve craved an easy fix for my brokenness and some mystical spell to heal the hurt I hid deep inside my heart. “Say these magic words.” I was willing to chant, burn sage, or sing to the goddess—anything to heal.

The night seemed like a thrilling adventure, with darkness and dreams crafting an electrifying realm for my emotions—a true treasure chest! After all, hiding is my secret superpower.

I will not have you without the darkness that hides within you. I will not let you have me without the madness that makes me. If our demons cannot dance, neither can we.

Nikita Gill

Live It

Life is a wild adventure, filled with both pain and joy that weave together to create our unique stories. Navigating this journey is rarely smooth; we all encounter our fair share of bumps along the way. Some might refer to it as the tumbling of the stones—each challenge shaping us in unexpected ways. But seriously, does it really make us better people? It’s a thought worth pondering as we embrace the ups and downs!

The three main types of trauma are acute trauma, chronic trauma, and complex trauma. Acute trauma results from a single distressing event, while chronic trauma is caused by repeated or prolonged exposure to traumatic experiences. Complex trauma, on the other hand, involves exposure to multiple traumatic events, often of an interpersonal nature. - Early Connections 

There’s a time after trauma after you first look into the eyes of pain, and you finally stop running, stop hiding. It’s then when healing begins. Or maybe healing starts before this, and you’ve been picking at the edges of your sores, making the pain worse, in and out of the process, hiding your feelings with work or medication. It may be time to get help. Seek counsel. Stop torturing yourself. And face the truth.

I hope you’ve seen the darkness for what it is. It’s not the holder of scary creatures, the keeper of magic potions, or the container for the wrath of the gods. You can relax. You can look at your life for what it is. You name the darkness. 

Can you look deeper into the darkness? Its mystery isn’t there to be seen. Bring your light, bring your truth. You’ll understand.