Name That Cookie

Years ago, when I was married, my mother-in-law shared her memory of the best sugar cookies in the world. But, she didn’t have the recipe. It was her mom’s recipe, and her mom never wrote a recipe on paper. Earline remembered eating them as a child fresh from the oven. They were soft and cake-like, somewhat crumbly. She tried adapting sugar cookie recipes to create something similar, but they weren’t quite right. What’s a woman with a cookie craving to do?

Another Strategy?

How many times have we spouted the great words of wisdom, “The definition of insanity is doing the same thing but expecting to get different results?” Psychology Today We sometimes mock people who keep trying, but I wonder if we don’t give up too quickly. Anyway, I call trying and trying determination. There’s also a time to do things a little different. Sometimes calling a friend can help. Or get some air.

Feedback, please

I’m tenacious. Sometimes to a fault. That spot is coming out of the carpet. It’s difficult for me to know when to call it quits. I’m uncertain when to stop scrubbing the carpet or to stop trying different cleaning products. There’s not an indicator light to give me feedback, to let me know I’m at peak cleaning potential. At least not until the carpet is restored to the original color. If I succeed, I’ve fed my belief that Tenacity rules! But I tell myself this tale whether it’s true or not.

My motto as a teenager was to not give up. I loved this quote,

Never give in–never, never, never, never, in nothing great or small, large or petty, never give in except to convictions of honour and good sense. Never yield to force; never yield to the apparently overwhelming might of the enemy.Sir Winston ChurchillSpeech, 1941, Harrow School
British politician (1874 – 1965)

Know Your Team

It’s funny how we can mislabel things for years, misjudge, and misunderstand. Yeah, I went there. I work in the health care industry, so I see symbols all day. Hearts, snakes, and poles. Their meanings along with all of the medical language make me aware of how we communicate with each other. The hearts aren’t referring to love. The poles aren’t sexy. And if you see a naked man or woman, you might want to close your eyes.

Cookies

Oh, and those weren’t sugar cookies by the way. Earline eventually asked her older sister if she knew the recipe. Sis called them Oma’s cookies. Together they found a recipe for Oma, German for Grandma’s cookies. It’s a simple, no-fuss cookie recipe by the way.

My recipes-Omas Sugar Cookies

project pastry-Omas Sugar Cookies

 

Check the Label

English: Cut Green Beans Español: Habichuelas ...

When I was a kid you could buy discounted canned goods in a little store nearby. They were damaged. Some were labeled and some were written on with a Sharpie, and some you had no idea what was in them. But they were cheap. So you shake the can and listen to the rattle and slosh. Does it sound like corn or green beans? Maybe peas. You can compare the cans by size and shape and sometimes match them.  This is so much like dating it’s ridiculous, except without the shaking. Does he dress nice? What type of car does he drive? I-I-I don’t know, she’s rude to her mom, will she be rude to me later in the relationship? When we say I love you, we sometimes think we mean the same thing or that the other person understands what we mean.

Just four months into their marriage, Pond said she became frightened for her safety and began making plans to leave. The couple separated and Pond went public the spring of 2009 with her fears that he killed his first wife. – Lucky wife, from ABCnews

The label may say love, but is that what’s really inside?

Love is just a feeling of connection to another person or object. It’s so easily misidentified as “I can’t live without this person.” There may be love inside there somewhere, but codependency is not love. Also, love doesn’t mean that this relationship is healthy. There are those I have loved that I had to get away from. I have active mirror neurons. People don’t come with labels and we can’t shake them to hear the rattle, but we can try to read the signs. Paranoia isn’t necessary but ask your friends who’ve met the person you’re interested in. Sometimes they’ll see things you don’t. Sometimes it’s only after a relationship ends in disaster that family and friends will speak up, but we need to listen to them earlier. So speak up people.

If you didn’t need them, emotionally or physically, would you want to be with them?

One of my issues in the past was romanticizing the relationship, projecting forward a future coupling of our perfect relationship and not living with the real relationship. It’s difficult to see the reality when you’re watching the fantasy. Take off the rosy glasses. Get real. Be as truthful with yourself as you possibly can then enjoy what you have. No relationship is perfect and all of them change, so it’s possible to think you start off okay and then watch it dive off of a cliff. If that’s the case, reassess and do what needs to be done. Life happens.

Immature love says: ‘I love you because I need you.’ Mature love says ‘I need you because I love you. – Erich Fromm

Ten faces of love – psychology today